Summer 2009 Movies: What to Watch and What to Skip
July 29th, 2009 by Barak
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I was in New York for the first time last week. My brother was in South America for six months, and he wanted the person he loves the most to spend the last week of his trip (double meaning?) in New York with him. After his girlfriend said she couldn’t come, our parents were busy, and his best friend refused, he invited me. So I came.
We saw a lot of celebrities, including: Samuel L. Jackson, Jodie Foster, Johnny Depp, Hugh Grant, Jennifer Aniston and even Barack Obama. All in Madame Tussauds. For real, we did see James Gandolfini after his Broadway show God of Carnage. He was really nice, signing autographs and answering rich old ladies’ questions. Tony Soprano would have strangled them with a wire.
I was there for 8 days and saw a movie a day. To save you the money and heartache, here is my advice about each of them:
8. Bruno

This makes Borat seem like a Disney movie. It’s politically incorrect, outrageous and most of all hilarious: The woman who sat in the row in front of me kept saying “Oh my god!” and the woman in the row behind me kept saying: “Oh my gosh.” As all comedians know, comedy is about knowing where the line is, and crossing it. (Just look at Channel4’s most outrageous comedies.) Most comedians cross by a little – let’s say from Manhattan to New Jersey. Sacha Baron Cohen crosses from Manhattan to Australia (if you are weak in geography, it’s far, very far).
My Rating: 10 – Couldn’t stop laughing
7. Public Enemies

Johnny Depp and Christian Bale emerge from two of the biggest blockbuster series of all time (Pirates of the Caribbean and Batman) to star in this crime drama from Michael Mann (Heat). Depp stars as legendary gangster John Dillinger, while Bale plays FBI agent Melvin Purvis. I came with high expectations and was quite disappointed. It’s too slow, I couldn’t identify with any of the characters, Bale delivers another monotonous, expressionless performance (in Batman it was fine; here it’s not). Not a bad movie, but it could have been much better.
My Rating: 6 – I never thought a gangster movie starring Johnny Depp and Christian Bale could be boring.
6. The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3

In this remake of the critically acclaimed movie from 1974, a subway dispatcher (Denzel Washington) uses his extensive knowledge of the transit system to outwit hijackers who are threatening to kill passengers unless a ransom is paid. It’s a problem when you make a remake of a great movie. People will always say: Why did you have to ruin it? Couldn’t you just leave it alone? Never mind comparisons to the original, this is a very good movie: thrilling, intense, fast paced.
My Rating: 7 – Good, but don’t skip your son’s Bar Mitzvah for it.
5. Year One

This comedy stars Michael Cera and funnyman Jack Black as men who are banished from their ancient village, causing them to travel across the world and encounter historical characters. With a supporting cast that includes Olivia Wilde, Oliver Platt, Hank Azaria, Vinnie Jones and David Cross, with director Harold Ramis (Groundhog Day) and super-producer Judd Apatow, nothing could go wrong, right? Wrong. There wasn’t one laugh-out-loud moment in this hugely disappointing movie.
My Rating: 5 – It’s Life of Brian and History of the World: Part 1 - without the laughs.
4. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

J.K. Rowling’s sixth novel is brought to the screen by David Yates, director of Harry Potter and The Order of The Phoenix. Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint, and Emma Watson are back as the beloved Hogwarts students, and Oscar winner Jim Broadbent joins as Horace Slughorn. It’s the darkest of the Harry Potter movies, not suitable for children in my opinion. It might also be the best movie of the series: I was pleasantly surprised. If I had to say one bad thing about it, it would be that it’s a bit too long. I had to pee and I thought the movie was about to end any second, so I waited. It ended many seconds later. Very unhealthy for my bladder.
(This is a very important article about Harry Potter.)
My Rating: 8 – Take your kid to the restroom before the movie begins, and don’t forget to go yourself.
3. (500) Days of Summer

After his girlfriend dumps him, a greeting-card writer reflects on their 500 days together to try to figure out where their love affair went wrong. I came to this movie expecting yet another nice indie romantic comedy. What I got was a fantastic, clever and witty movie. Zooey Deschanel and Joseph Gordon-Levitt are both great. It’s original and heartfelt and has real insight about relationships. One of the best movies I’ve seen, not just this summer, not just this year, but ever. (Okay, maybe being on vacation in New York helped).
My Rating: 10 - Joseph Gordon-Levitt, your name is too long.
2. Whatever Works

Woody – nothing works. You already told that joke, and that one too, and you already said those things about religion, politics and relationships. Larry David in his first major movie role steps into the shoes of the neurotic, depressed, brilliant Jew (or of Woody Allen) quite comfortably. He is pretty good (as Larry likes to say) but it’s not enough to save this movie. The people in the audience who laughed probably did so because: 1. It was the first Woody Allen movie they ever saw, or 2. (more likely) they just wanted to appear smart - “We are laughing in a Woody Allen movie, so we must be intellectuals.” Larry David and Woody Allen are both geniuses; it’s too bad their collaboration failed.
My Rating: 5 – Curb Your Enthusiasm regarding this movie.
1. Away We Go

Director Sam Mendes (American Beauty) ventures into comedy with this film starring TV regulars John Krasinski (The Office) and Maya Rudolph (Saturday Night Live), in which a couple about to have a baby take a road trip to find the perfect place to raise a family. After the awful Revolutionary Road, Mendes is back in form: this is “dramedy” at its best, just the right amount of funny and touching moments. Most of the humor comes from Krasinski (Jim to you), while funny woman Rudolph is great in her slightly more dramatic role. It’s realistic, heartwarming, slow, yet not even remotely boring.
My Rating: 9 – Jim, does Pam know you’re seeing other women?
And a bonus, two additional movies I want to see:
Ponyo
In this film, the story of The Little Mermaid is brought to modern-day Japan, where a small fish named Ponyo wants to live with a five-year-old boy named Sosuke. The trailer went something like this: From the great genius who brought you Spirited Away comes Ponyo, the best movie of the last 114 years, the movie that will change your life for ever. Ponyo – the bible of animated movies, Hayao Miyazaki – the Japanese Jesus. I’m considering converting to Ponyoism. And a word to Mr. trailer narrator: relax, it’s only a f–g cartoon.
Funny People

Judd Apatow rounds up the usual suspects - Adam Sandler, Seth Rogen, Leslie Mann, and Jonah Hill - as well as Eric Bana, Jason Schwartzman, and RZA - for his third feature as a director. Despite another all-star-cast, hopefully Apatow’s Year One fiasco will not repeat in this story of a popular comedian who comes far closer to death than he ever imagined. I really wanted to see it but the studios didn’t agree to push their release date earlier and I couldn’t stay any longer in New York since my boss didn’t agree to extend my vacation. Plus my spending allowance finished – what’s with the outrageous $12.50 per ticket??
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